How to be a Bitch

How to be a Bitch |
Umm.. really, Jess? You’re going to tell us how to be a bitch?
Yes and here’s why – I’m too nice. I say yes to everything, get walked all over and never stand up for myself. Or I should say I was too nice. 
I think that growing up and maturing gives you a different perspective on relationships and humans in general. I have always been wayyy too aware of other peoples’ feelings and put everyone else ahead of myself. This is not a good thing, especially when it comes to your professional life.
If I’ve learned anything over the past few years, it’s that you have to look out for yourself because no one else is going to. If something doesn’t seem right, stand up for yourself. 
Now, a few months ago, I took this to the extreme. I actually yelled at my boss and essentially told her she’s not doing her job and is a terrible boss. While everything I said was true, I really should have toned it back and had a civil discussion with her instead of going in throwing elbows.
You live, you learn, right?
Here are my tips on how to be a bitch:

Say no.

If you’re super busy and literally do not have time for an added task, say no. You’re only one person and can only do so much. There is absolutely no benefit to saying yes and then slacking on your other work. If need be, explain this! All you have to do is say “Listen, I would absolutely love to take on this assignment, but I’m really pressed for time with the other tasks on my to do list and I don’t want to let them slide”. Wordsmith, I know.. *takes a bow*

Don’t agree with everything.

Not only will this show that you can stand up for yourself, it also shows that you are a person who has his/her own opinions. If you can, suggest something that may work better. This shows initiative and that you have a vested interest in the project. I am super jealous of my sister-inlaw because she has mastered this skill – she honestly could be a lawyer.  

You don’t need to be friends with everyone.

This is the point I struggled with most. I really take it personally if someone doesn’t like me. But what I had to realize is that I don’t like every single person in the world, so why should every single person be required to like me? We all have different personalities; some of us will get along, some of us won’t. That’s life. 


Don’t talk about people behind their backs – say it to their face.

Oh, mama. This one is tough too. But, if you have a problem with someone, go to them and not your co-worker. There’s a 100% chance that someone has done something to piss you off in the past. Did you talk to them about it? Or did you go behind their back and talk about how they’re such a doo-doo head (yep..I just said that). It may have been a miscommunication – work it out. 

Let it go.

If someone says a mean or downright rude comment to you, let it go (sing it, Idina Menzel!). Maybe they were having a bad day. Maybe they’re just a terrible person. Who cares? If they are truly a rude person, karma will come around, so don’t let it faze you. Again, easier said than done, I am aware. Here’s what I do: I just look them right in the eye and don’t say anything. Or, if it’s on the phone, I just let them finish. They may just need to vent and you are the outlet. 90% of the time, they realize they were rude and they apologize. The stare down works LOL.
Hopefully these 5 tips will help you to be a bitch more assertive. Once you assert yourself, it is less likely that you will be walked all over. 
Are you an overly sensitive person? Do you have any tips on how to be a bitch? I’d love to hear them. 

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